Which set of words are you more attracted to?

Which set of words are you more attracted to?  And how do they make you feel?

Flow, intuition, feel, grace, possibility, joy, liberation, exploration, adventure, curiosity, engagement, choice

OR

Work, intensity, strive, 'be perfect', gains, suffering, labour, command, control, pressure, demand, insistence, non-negotiable

The difference between self-belief and arrogance and The Donny Kruger effect

Over the last month I've immersed myself in 'The High Performance Podcast' with Jake Humphrey and Prof. Damian Hughes.  If you are yet to listen to it, I can't recommend it enough.  It brings you an intimate glimpse into the lives of high-achieving, world-class performers who have all excelled in their field with first-hand experiences and lessons to share (if you want to blow your mind, listen to the episode with Jonny Wilkinson!)...

During the end of series 2 round-up Jake and Damian had a fascinating discussion on the fine-line/difference between self-belief and arrogance.

Arrogance was defined as 'camouflage for insecurity' and often associated with blame culture and 'pointing fingers'.  Damian quoted the Donny Kruger effect as being a cognitive bias in which people with low ability at a task overestimate their ability. It is related to the cognitive bias of illusory superiority and comes from the inability of people to recognise their lack of ability.

Self-belief on the other hand is more around building 'evidence' that you can do/achieve something.  

I guess that evidence principally comes by putting in the work, developing the necessary skill-set (ability) to achieve the task and by employing powerful visualisation and self-affirming 'inner talk' that always begins with the thought, 'I can do this!'....

No more important than right now as we come back to 'it' after this second lock-down.



Enabling a delusion or inspiring a dream

We want kids to dream.  In fact it's our job as coaches to inspire them to dream.

Dream of playing on Wimbledon's centre court.

Dream of being world number 1.

Dream of being a professional tennis player.

Dream of.....whatever it is or whoever they want to become.

And yet there is such a fine line between selling the dream (and quite possibly profiting from it) and 'enabling a delusion' that the kid is actually going to make it when we know the odds are so heavily stacked against them or that they are clearly not in the ball park.

Tough calls, decisions and conversations that require honesty, integrity and sensitivity.